The flat look that Sheehan receives in return to his question is so very done. It's like he had this way of irritating him enough that he feels like he has to answer, so that he can convince himself he's not going insane.

"Look...we both know what this is, why do I have to say it out loud? Or do you get some weird, satisfaction when I admit shit I'd rather forget exists at all?" If he doesn't say it, he can file this conversation away and not think about it ever again. Well. Maybe not. Sheehan knows more. Again. And he's not going to forget that.

But he most certainly won't forget it if he says, "being afraid doesn't help anything, so if I just ignore it, it doesn't exist. Why can't you just let me do that? Why does it even matter?"