"Not at all," he says with a smile. "Depends on how comfortable you want to be. The couch seems to throw people, but I think that's just become a stereotype. I like to sit on it and read. Chairs are easy."
A couch is a place he sits if he’s already comfortable. At this point, he doesn’t feel that remotely, even though he doesn’t show any overt signs of discomfort.
“The chairs are fine.”
He selects one without any fanfare and has a seat.
“I’ve brought the file that I have. I don’t know what sort of policy you have here with regards to discussing the personal information of clients with colleagues, but whatever it might or might not be, I’d like to stipulate that I would prefer it if you only discussed it with Kiryu.”
"I don't discuss anything with any of the others here unless you explicitly request it."
He holds a hand out for the file as he sits in the opposite chair. He's not behind the desk. Not for this.
He takes note of the blatant Malcolm exclusion but says nothing.
"This first time, I just want to establish some expectations from both of us and to get your goals. Basic stuff." He gestures to Archer. "So what are you hoping for here?"
Archer’s expression doesn’t change as hands over the file. His life is a complicated mess so even though part of him revolts at the idea of this, logically, he knows it’s the best way forward.
To the question, however…there’s a pause as he tries to figure out to put words together that make sense.
At length, he puffs out a soft breath.
“If all goes well, ultimately, I want my young ward to come here. But for myself…I was recently reminded that I have…triggers. And when certain things happen, the way my partner describes it, I get lost in my own head. He bears the brunt of those…episodes, such as they are. And even though he does not begrudge helping me, I do not want it to fall solely on his shoulders.”
He sets the file on his desk to read for later so he can really absorb it. For now, he focuses on the Archer in front of him, rather than the one in the file.
"Do you want to talk about a specific recent incident?"
He doesn’t, really, but he is smart enough to know that he’s not going to get anything out of this if he doesn’t put anything into it.
“…it came about as a result of the curses. I suspect I wasn’t affected by them because of what I am - but most of the people around me were, including my partner. By the time I ran into him, he’d already attacked multiple people. I had to subdue him, drag him down to Zero, and then try to keep the kitchen open and functioning when most of the staff were incapacitated. I don’t need to sleep so I wasn’t planning to take much of a break after that - but my partner insisted.”
Sheehan's dealt with far more stubborn people, but most of them don't willingly walk into his office.
"So you had to forcibly take your partner, who was already aggressive in a way you aren't used to from him, to Zero and then go about your business like normal, but alone and on guard?"
“I shut off my emotions. And it likely would have taken a while for me to fix that if my partner hadn’t insisted I spend some tine resting after all of it was over.”
He nods. "It sounds as if you're closing yourself off as a protection. Is there ever a time when it gets so severe that you don't recognize yourself or the things around you?"
“I read. I knit. Sometimes I bake. I have a cat, and she’s been helpful to me at times. I also have my partner, of course, and sometimes we go to the Enclosure or watch films together.”
“Because the noise, everything behind the…door I mentioned is still there. Worse sometimes than when I closed it. And stopping long enough to…do those things. Appreciate those things. Means I have open it.”
And then, it’s like there’s screaming inside his head.
"That takes a lot of effort," he observes, though there's a question to it as well. He never wants to put words in Archer's mouth, but he wants to ensure that he understands.
“My partner helped me through the last episode. And though I have had…worse moments…and have reacted worse to others trying to help me in the past… I would like to think I can…still learn how to manage things better.”
He’s never going to be completely all right. Archer simply can’t grasp the idea of any iteration of himself where he isn’t always dogged by his past to some degree. But he doesn’t want Godric to be the only thing that brings him back when he goes so far away.
"I think you can do that, Archer. I really do. I'd like to help you, if you do decide to come back. I think what we can work on is getting through your triggers, the environmental factors that happen just before. If we can start to work on stopping it before it happens, then that will help."
He writes in his book. "How often does this happen?"
"Events like those normally only occur once or twice a year. I'll have been here almost four years in a few months, and I can count on one hand how many times it's happened."
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timeasmymeasure
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 12:01 am (UTC)Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 01:08 am (UTC)“No, thank you. I can eat and drink, but it doesn’t really do much for me.”
He spares a brief, cursory glance around the room.
“Does it matter where I sit?”
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 01:13 am (UTC)Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 04:40 am (UTC)“The chairs are fine.”
He selects one without any fanfare and has a seat.
“I’ve brought the file that I have. I don’t know what sort of policy you have here with regards to discussing the personal information of clients with colleagues, but whatever it might or might not be, I’d like to stipulate that I would prefer it if you only discussed it with Kiryu.”
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 12:56 pm (UTC)He holds a hand out for the file as he sits in the opposite chair. He's not behind the desk. Not for this.
He takes note of the blatant Malcolm exclusion but says nothing.
"This first time, I just want to establish some expectations from both of us and to get your goals. Basic stuff." He gestures to Archer. "So what are you hoping for here?"
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 01:15 pm (UTC)To the question, however…there’s a pause as he tries to figure out to put words together that make sense.
At length, he puffs out a soft breath.
“If all goes well, ultimately, I want my young ward to come here. But for myself…I was recently reminded that I have…triggers. And when certain things happen, the way my partner describes it, I get lost in my own head. He bears the brunt of those…episodes, such as they are. And even though he does not begrudge helping me, I do not want it to fall solely on his shoulders.”
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 05:49 pm (UTC)He sets the file on his desk to read for later so he can really absorb it. For now, he focuses on the Archer in front of him, rather than the one in the file.
"Do you want to talk about a specific recent incident?"
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 06:53 pm (UTC)“…it came about as a result of the curses. I suspect I wasn’t affected by them because of what I am - but most of the people around me were, including my partner. By the time I ran into him, he’d already attacked multiple people. I had to subdue him, drag him down to Zero, and then try to keep the kitchen open and functioning when most of the staff were incapacitated. I don’t need to sleep so I wasn’t planning to take much of a break after that - but my partner insisted.”
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 06:56 pm (UTC)"So you had to forcibly take your partner, who was already aggressive in a way you aren't used to from him, to Zero and then go about your business like normal, but alone and on guard?"
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 07:28 pm (UTC)He says it without emotion. Just reporting the facts.
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 08:32 pm (UTC)He leans back, pen in hand, notebook in his lap, expertly turned away. Sheehan uses his own shorthand, but it's always good to be careful.
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 11:32 pm (UTC)“I shut off my emotions. And it likely would have taken a while for me to fix that if my partner hadn’t insisted I spend some tine resting after all of it was over.”
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 11:36 pm (UTC)Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-29 11:53 pm (UTC)“I would say it’s like locking something very loud behind a thick door. Close to sound proofed but not quite. So everything is there but muffled.”
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-30 01:26 am (UTC)Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-30 01:37 am (UTC)Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-30 01:38 am (UTC)"You said that you got better with rest? What does rest look like for you?"
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-30 02:07 am (UTC)“I read. I knit. Sometimes I bake. I have a cat, and she’s been helpful to me at times. I also have my partner, of course, and sometimes we go to the Enclosure or watch films together.”
Wholesome, old man things.
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-30 02:16 am (UTC)Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-30 02:24 am (UTC)“Because the noise, everything behind the…door I mentioned is still there. Worse sometimes than when I closed it. And stopping long enough to…do those things. Appreciate those things. Means I have open it.”
And then, it’s like there’s screaming inside his head.
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-30 02:27 am (UTC)"So you need someone to help you through it now."
Re: spam
Date: 2023-11-30 04:07 am (UTC)“My partner helped me through the last episode. And though I have had…worse moments…and have reacted worse to others trying to help me in the past… I would like to think I can…still learn how to manage things better.”
He’s never going to be completely all right. Archer simply can’t grasp the idea of any iteration of himself where he isn’t always dogged by his past to some degree. But he doesn’t want Godric to be the only thing that brings him back when he goes so far away.
Re: spam
Date: 2023-12-01 01:56 am (UTC)He writes in his book. "How often does this happen?"
Re: spam
Date: 2023-12-01 02:44 am (UTC)A pause.
"I know why it happens, though."
Re: spam
Date: 2023-12-01 02:48 am (UTC)Re: spam
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