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[heyboss]

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[reviewstarlight]

You care about me because you're my warden. I'm not an idiot, Dr. Sheehan. I know we'd never be friends if we weren't paired. You'd barely talk to me. The only reason you do, the only reason you say you care about me is cause we're paired.

[heyboss]

No, the only reason I came to find you that month is because we're paired. But I care about you because of you.

And you don't know if we'd talk or not. We talked before.

You know I don't have a deal, right? That I'm here because I want to be. Because I - want to help you.

[reviewstarlight]

If you really wanted to help, you wouldn't say useless stuff like 'I don't have a deal.' You could use a deal to donate money to an orphanage. Or end a disease. Or help rebuild after a natural disaster. You know. Stuff that actually helps.

I don't think you want to help. I think you just want to see immediate results.

[heyboss]

Immediate results? Nana, now I'm genuinely confused.

[reviewstarlight]

There are plenty of ways you can actually help that aren't the Barge. But none of them give that immediate satisfaction of a person being alive again or a plate of cookies from the Admiral.

Why don't you have a psychiatric practice?

[heyboss]

Here? On the Barge?

I tried. It didn't go well. I still see people, though.

[reviewstarlight]

Why don't you have one back home? If you had one, I don't think you'd be here.

[heyboss]

Why don't you come over for tea? I'll tell you my story.

And Andrew's, too.

[reviewstarlight]

I'll be over in five minutes.

[ And five minutes later, there's a knock on Sheehan's door. ]

[heyboss]

[He opens the door for her and lets her inside.]

Go on and sit. I've got the water boiling.

[reviewstarlight]

[ Nana gives Sheehan a bright smile and a nod, though her cheerful Banana exterior isn't making it's way to her eyes. She's going through the motions, smiling and grinning, but she's so done and it's so apparent. ]

Do you need any help with the tea?

[heyboss]

"Just set the cups on the table, if you don't mind?"

He holds them out to her along with a few boxes of tea.

[reviewstarlight]

"Of course." Nana gives Sheehan a smile before setting the cups on opposite sides of the table, across from each other.

[heyboss]

He joins her with the hot water and tea bags, choosing one of his own and setting it in the cup.

"What would you like to know? From the beginning, or just about my practice?"

[reviewstarlight]

"You already told me a bit about yourself," Nana points out. "About that perfect stage you crafted, where you let the patient live out the delusions of his story. Do you do that for all your patients?"

[heyboss]

"No," he tells her. "No, Andrew was a special case. He was - violent. He hurt guards, other patients, and even me a few times. He refused to believe the truth of what he had done. They were going to lobotomize him. Against our wishes."

He looks down into his tea. "It was a last ditch effort."

[reviewstarlight]

Andrew. So that patient's name was Andrew.

Nana pauses for a moment, taking a sip of her tea, before continuing.

"My Starlight was a special case as well. We're the same in that way. We'd both do anything to try and help the people we care about. So really, there's no reason why you're a warden and I'm not."

[heyboss]

He looks up. "I know that's what you think, Nana, but it's about the harm caused. And in my case, it didn't work. Andrew - he regressed. Or he - chose to. And I let him make that choice. I had to."

[reviewstarlight]

"You didn't have to," Nana says, with a shake of her head. "You chose to. You could always try again. You don't...you don't give up on the people you're trying to protect like that."

[heyboss]

"No. He chose it, Nana. Because I gave him the choice."

He sips at his tea, then takes the teabag out and adds sugar. "I didn't give up on him. I did what I could to help him, then I did something else."

[reviewstarlight]

"If one of the choices hurts him like that, then it's a terrible choice," Nana says, without any hesitation. "You're a psychiatrist. You're supposed to protect your patients."

[heyboss]

"I didn't know which choice hurt him more," he says. "And isn't that what you did for Niji?" You wanted to save her, to make choices for her, but you had to weigh those options. Are you a terrible person for taking her out? Of course not. You're kind and compassionate. But you were showing her love when you put her back. Even if that was hard for you."

[reviewstarlight]

"There's got to be a better way. I just...I want to protect my friends from all the hurt in the world. I know you do also. So to hear you say that the better way still made him suffer...I know this sounds stupid, but it shouldn't be that way."

[heyboss]

"Seeing people get hurt, people you care about, is hard, Nana. But it's part of life. It's the way that things have to be. There has to be balance in the world, or life is not worth living," he explains softly.

[reviewstarlight]

Nana remains quiet, thinking over Sheehan's words, before,

"I'm not gonna quit the revue back home. I don't know if I can. But I also don't know what I'd ask for if I won."