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[heyboss]

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[falkeditupagain]

Hanna chews on his lip, stopping in his pacing to slowly look back at Sheehan. Why?

"Probably a bunch of reasons. Because you frustrate me, because I get uncomfortable and don't know how to handle it...because I feel like if I push enough, you'll realize I'm not worth it and leave like I know you should."

[heyboss]

"Do you think you're good enough to hide your true nature from me?" he asks and there's a little teasing in it because he doesn't like to drop heavy things on Hanna too much. He is giving him an out, just a little one.

[falkeditupagain]

He raises an eyebrow at him, "and what does 'true nature' mean? I'm not just secretly reveling in the fact that I can be an ass and laughing about it like a litte goblin..." He doesn't like to be at all, really.

But the truth of what happened, how he operates, who he is now as some rotten fucking shell of a boy, no one wanted to hear it, so it's easier to just push them away before they got close enough to tell him he's crazy. It makes no sense, he knows Sheehan had seen it, but that doesn't make his behavior any more rational.

[heyboss]

"And I can be an ass, too. But you are worth caring about, Hanna. You are worth caring about a lot. So - that's what I intend on doing. And if you need to snap at me a lot before you realize it, then so be it."

[falkeditupagain]

He's quiet a moment before taking in a deep breath. Fine.

"I lied to you before. The D doesn't stand for doctor."

[heyboss]

It takes Sheehan a moment to switch gears, but he lands back on the nickname.

"Yeah? What does it mean?"

[falkeditupagain]

"I suppose it's not so much a lie, more that the D can be interchangeable."

He shoved his hands in his pockets and pointedly stares at the wall, back facing Sheehan. Why is being honest so hard and generally embarrassing?

"Sometimes it stands for dick when you're being one, not as likely. But when you're being all...disappointed, or telling me that despite any kind of resistance you're still going to care? It's dad. C-cause it's hard to not hear it like you say it and not think about him and I have no idea how to deal with that, but maybe after I graduate I'll get you a picture, show you how weird it is to look at you and see the outline of him."

[heyboss]

Sheehan doesn't know what he was expecting, but it certainly wasn't that. He had thought about being a father figure for Faroe, of course, but that's different. He's going to be in her life forever, until he dies, and that's a commitment he walked into with thought and intention.

Hanna, though, is a different beast. He's a friend that Sheehan has cultivated from the ground up and somewhere along the way, it became this.

He pushes off of the chair again and reaches out for Hanna to wrap his arms around him in a tight embrace.

"I care about you, Hanna. I love you. And I'm honored that you'd think of me that way. But - I am never disappointed in you. Just in the decisions that you make."

[falkeditupagain]

It's unfortunately Sheehan's fault for being a fun, positive male role model that made the decision to give him any kind of attention at all.

He had been expecting the hug the moment he heard him get up from his chair, but he can't help but laugh, shaking his head. His hands coming up to hold the arms around him and despite that lingering feeling of discomfort, it's really nice to hear I love you again from a voice he trusts and cares about. Breaches be fucking damned, he didn't need one to find family.

"That's the most dad fucking thing to say too. Now you're just doing it on purpose..."

[heyboss]

"I wouldn't know," he teases lightly because, yes, that's' exactly what he was doing. "My dad was a piece of shit."

He holds him tightly, though. This time, it's Sheehan who needs the embrace.

[falkeditupagain]

Well that's a surprise seeing how well he fills the roll himself.

"Yeah, well you won't be." He says it with the most confidence, leaning forward slightly so he can feel the gentle pull, tightening his own grip.

[heyboss]

"Thanks, Hanna." He leans back, his hands on his shoulders again. "So what brought this all on?"

[falkeditupagain]

"You're going to have to be more specific." Because currently he isn't sure if it's because he mentioned the D word, his abandonment issues, punching Arthur. There are plenty of topics to choose from.

[heyboss]

"You bringing all of this here to me today. Did it just get to be too much?" he wonders, sliding his hands down his arms.

[falkeditupagain]

"Oh." Yeah, no. There was a reason for that.

"My buddy David. He's gone, but he wrote me something, I just felt like maybe I should follow in his footsteps, be a little honest while I'm here rather than before it's too late."

[heyboss]

"David," he repeats. "That was Saga's inmate, right? God, I - I hate that he's gone." He hates that any of them are gone, but David had potential. "What did he write?"

[falkeditupagain]

"Thanks for getting me somewhere worth stopping at." There's a lot more, about how his big feelings and inability to not care about everyone he stumbles across helped David want to care too, but. That was a good bit.

"He was kinda quiet. But it was for a reason. Didn't want him to feel like he was alone, and it's good to know he didn't feel that way any more, even wanted to remember what it felt like to care and...I guess, it didn't help that Malcolm was being Malcolm at me earlier too, but I knew I wanted a hug even though it felt weird to ask for, so here I am." And he got one.

[heyboss]

"I am glad of that, too. I know that - he needed the companionship as much as anyone else. Maybe more." He looks away a moment.

"What did Malcolm say?"

[falkeditupagain]

Hanna frowns, not exactly wanting to repeat it because it was still too forward, sharp to hold.

"Enough. I told him off for it and he apologized. That's all."

[heyboss]

Sheehan's had too many run ins with Malcolm, but as long as Hanna is satisfied, then he is, too.

"Did you accept the apology? Do you believe he means it?"

[falkeditupagain]

"I mean, I can tell it was like...compulsive. And I can be like that too. He was pretty sincere. I told him I'd forgive him later though. Didn't exactly feel like it at the moment."

He'll probably call him later though, just so he doesn't leave it sitting.

[heyboss]

"I'm glad of that, Hanna. You seemed to handle that well." He rubs his face. "Anyway, whatever the cost, whatever it was, I'm glad you came here. And - my door's always open to you if you need a place."

[falkeditupagain]

"Well, it was walk away or try and punch him again. Which- did you know Malcolm's a werewolf? Cause I didn't and it pissed me off cause I totally could have landed that first punch if he wasn't fast as fuck. Absolutely unfair advantage." He's going to be bitter about this and his lack of skill in sensing magic for a while. He missed his stupid little hammer with its detection rune on it.

[heyboss]

"I did know that," he admits quietly. "But it never seemed to be an issue. It really hasn't come up. But I can recognize his wolf form. Didn't know about the super speed thing..."

[falkeditupagain]

"Not really super, just. Wolves are fast, you know? Faster than me." Like most of the paranormal he deals with, but generally he likes to know what he's dealing with.

He laughs, shaking his head, "dumb thing to do, try to punch a werewolf."