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Apr. 21st, 2023 04:31 am
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Re: Voice

Date: 2025-02-24 12:11 am (UTC)
artistinexile: (ascendancy!challenging)
From: [personal profile] artistinexile
[Cold red eyes stare into Sheehan]

You have evidence of that claim?

Re: Voice

Date: 2025-02-24 12:18 am (UTC)
artistinexile: (sassy)
From: [personal profile] artistinexile
My warden believes the opposite. That my numerous projects dedicated to self-and-environmental improvement are mere distractions from the overarching, ultimate goal of graduation.

Re: Voice

Date: 2025-02-24 03:08 pm (UTC)
artistinexile: (ascendancy!challenging)
From: [personal profile] artistinexile
Self-improvement.

May we return to my earlier question of what these sessions are to accomplish, and the markers that indicate progression?

Re: Voice

Date: 2025-02-24 07:32 pm (UTC)
artistinexile: (studying the board)
From: [personal profile] artistinexile
[There are many things Thrawn can say to this. He can attack from a place of semantics - attack through exact words - but finds that this is a position of weakness. He can go along with everything Sheehan has to say, but it would be a lie, and he is not comfortable with lying to an unknown opponent.

Is Sheehan his opponent? He considers his feelings on the matter.

He is angry with Florian for failing to procure Thrawn's desired outcomes - his projects, his graduation, his apparent foisting Thrawn off on another warden for more expert advice without being clear as to what that advice is. Moreover, he knows he is being reported on, and that there will be conversations between Sheehan and Florian behind his back.

He had not considered Florian an adversary, and frankly does not wish to: Florian can match him now in both strength and strategy. More worrisome, he can vastly outshine Thrawn in the realm of the political.

If he shuts this conversation down at the source, Florian will hear of it, and Thrawn will not move forward with anything he has planned. Yet the overarching goal - graduation - remains frustratingly elusive. Florian has said Thrawn is distracting himself from graduation, yet Sheehan is speaking as though Thrawn is wrong to seek it. In the middle of it all are these complicated relationships each of the Barge residents has with one another, a tangled knot refusing to reveal itself to him. He feels like he always feels in regards to interpersonal relationships and observing himself outside himself: fighting against a tide when he can't swim.

How to explain to the person in front of him that it is not a question of willpower, but a question of inability?

More frustrating is the last proper conversation he had with his warden about this; explaining that he is attempting to change, only to have Florian double back and say that Florian does not want him to change and has never demanded it. Does not graduation itself imply change?

He sits in silence, staring nearly through Sheehan at the question. It is asinine in its presumptions; progress without change. He feels, at once, both like a child and a person who has lived far too long]

Re: Voice

Date: 2025-02-25 03:35 am (UTC)
artistinexile: (eyebrow)
From: [personal profile] artistinexile
[They all want the same thing, Thrawn decides: for him to graduate and move on from this place. Whether that comes from an altruistic intent or not, it does not matter: for that reason alone, Florian and Sheehan are allies.

Perhaps not trusted ones. Not with certain things. But then again, who is?

He blinks, and comes back to the conversation]


You say that progress does not look the same to everyone, and graduation itself is considered a unique progression to everyone here. Yet you also offer your two graduated inmates as proof that you know the wrong path for graduation for me. I find that contradictory.

I constructed my previous life to be meaningful and manageable as best as I was able. I do not intend to have much of a life here - it is every inmate's goal, or should be, to leave this ship and move elsewhere. Growing comfortable would negate the change necessary to do so. In my experience, people who are comfortable do not intend to change.

Therefore I also find suspect your desire to only discuss topics that I would find comfortable.

Re: Voice

Date: 2025-02-27 03:06 am (UTC)
artistinexile: (ascendancy!despondant)
From: [personal profile] artistinexile
I see.

[he rolls those thoughts around before replying]

My warden has deemed it prudent I do as you say, or he will get the Admiral involved to force me. So if we were to end them, doubtless he will have something else in the works.

If you wish to establish common ground, I can tell you that I have had the most consistent success with people of a military or analytical background, and the most unsatisfactory results with those of a political persuasion. I do not do well with 'small talk', as my translator once called it. I enjoy art, as I'm sure you well know, and I use it as a tool for identifying culture and patterns of behavior: through art, I can tell what a culture values, how they may react to hostile engagement, and how best to defeat them in battle.

I have had more success with befriending women over men, particularly women who have a certain decisiveness. I do not like large groups, as I find the noise and etiquette overwhelming. My first community was an isolated one, punctured by premature loss; my species' family make-ups are difficult for outsiders to grasp and even Florian struggles. Better still was the group I fell into after my exile; a militaristic dictatorship that allowed me more freedom to combat other, lesser evils in the form of pirates and slavers. Much of my past, especially in my first community, is a matter of state secrecy and I will not divulge these apart from being coerced or forced.

In normal, every-day life I will have one or two persons who will be my closest confidants; any others are considered as good colleagues but nothing more. My singular hobby is art: others have attempted to engage me in activities over the years but I rapidly lose interest and offend them, though often I do not understand why. I can mimic behaviors for a time, but I also know this can offend as well.

Does that serve for establishing rapport, Doctor Sheehan?

Re: Voice

Date: 2025-02-27 07:50 pm (UTC)
artistinexile: (ascendancy!solemn)
From: [personal profile] artistinexile
I know of Earth and its world wars. I researched the preliminaries when I first arrived and took a more in-depth look after Steve Rogers mentioned it in passing. We had an interesting if brief discussion of the use of the word 'stormtrooper.'

[he may have been fondly reminded of a similar conversation forty years previous, when he mentioned the word skywalker to a certain Anakin Skywalker]

May I assume from your accent that you are of the American persuasion? And what was your role in your military?

And I admit a certain alarm about you. You are excited to help. I have not agreed I need your assistance, and I am indeed under the impression that if I do not obey, there will naturally be consequences. Let us not pretend otherwise and simply...move on.

Do you believe I am a criminal, or insane? I understand we have not had a chance yet to know one another properly, so I will understand if you've yet to form an opinion.

Re: Voice

Date: 2025-02-27 08:43 pm (UTC)
artistinexile: (ascendancy!ART OBSErVING)
From: [personal profile] artistinexile
I have nothing but respect for Army officers. Especially lieutenants.

It is. But you believe your experience with the criminally insane can assist here? I will be interested to find out why.

Re: Voice

Date: 2025-02-28 02:11 am (UTC)
artistinexile: (thinking)
From: [personal profile] artistinexile
Then that is the end of my questioning.

Apart from, of course, when I ought to return?

Re: Voice

Date: 2025-02-28 02:25 am (UTC)
artistinexile: (oh my stars)
From: [personal profile] artistinexile
[a short nod]

Very well.

Until then, Doctor Sheehan.

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Lester Sheehan

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