IC Inbox

[heyboss]

Video | Audio | Text | Spam

Comments

[weirdnecro]

I'm not apologizing for having feelings.

[Though...sometimes it would be great to return them to the store...]

I'm apologizing for being so volatile. You didn't know about that landmine.

[heyboss]

[He nods.]

I accept your apology. Water under the bridge.

I'm glad you're feeling better.

[weirdnecro]

[She offered a soft sigh.]

Arthur warned me you'd be nice. It's still kind of...I don't know.

[heyboss]

Arthur would know.

But really, Sokie. I meant what I said, but I'm am very sorry that I hurt you with my words.

[weirdnecro]

You didn't know Lester. I was already on edge.

I've been quietly having an identity crisis. Not to mention, as Arthur told me before I broke his nose, people are vulnerabilities to me.

Being claimed as a friend was...too much. It's still not comfortable.

[heyboss]

[Poor Arthur. Sheehan sits back, his hands in his lap.]

You phrase that in an interesting way.

'Claim' as a friend.

[weirdnecro]

[Well, she fixed it!]

Yes, well. My self worth is lower than the gutter. It's not that surprising.

[heyboss]

Tell me your fear. [He threads his fingers in his hair.]

[weirdnecro]

[She sighs. But she has to ask.]

Is it the friend or doctor asking?

[heyboss]

Friend. I'm not your doctor.

[weirdnecro]

Good. Had to check. As you told me to.

[She shrugs, and leans back in her seat.]

But the fear is...self defense, I suppose. I have a long history. If I don't leave people, they tend to go one of two routes:

They betray me. Or they die. Usually pretty horribly.

I tend not to bring back those who do.

They're never the same after.

[heyboss]

[That sure is a lot all wrapped up in one. But first - ]

Thank you. For keeping me in check. And for trusting me enough to tell me now.

[But then he goes quiet for a moment, thinking to himself.]

I can't imagine what it is to live a life as long as yours and see so many people come and go. People that I care about and love.

All I can say is that I am grateful for the time that you give me now. And I'd like to be your friend for as long as we're able to.

I'm human. I'm not meant to live forever and I kind of don't want to. But I do want to surround myself in people who care about me and who I care about because that's life. That's the best part of life.

And I'd like to have you there.

[weirdnecro]

[She's a big burrito of trauma.]

After a while, it becomes easier not to care. And more recently...

[She sighed, and rubbed the back of her head.]

I can try, but I am pretty...weird. About being called a friend, or anything like that.

Hell, I got warbly and nearly had a panic attack when I admitted that I love John. I'm not saying not to...try to be a friend Sheehan.

I'm just telling you I'm gonna be a hot mess sometimes, and really shitty and sensitive about the label. And you need to tell Arthur if I'm being an asshole.

I trust him to put me in check if I'm up in my head about it.

[heyboss]

Admitting love is more difficult than friendship?

[The request does make him smile.]

Sokie...I'm not going to tattle on you to my husband.

[weirdnecro]

Extremely. I broke down crying when John sang to me because I knew it came from love. And I hate crying like that. But, his cabin is my home. We agreed.

[She makes a face at him.]

Yes you are. Because if I'm being an ass to you, I'm going to be worse to someone I don't care about.

I'm serious Lester.

[heyboss]

[He sighs and then sits forward, holding out a hand to her.]

Alright. You respected my ask. I can do the same for you. It's a deal.

[weirdnecro]

[She leaned forward, and took his hand to shake firmly.]

Thank you Lester. I know it feels like tattling, but it could be dangerous.

And it helps that I don't like Arthur being hurt.

[heyboss]

I know you don't. [He sits back again.]

So what can I do to help you now?

[weirdnecro]

[She blows out a breath, sitting back and folding her arms under her chest.]

No idea Sheehan.

Other than...being you?

[heyboss]

Well, that's very good because I don't think I could be anyone else.

Tell me how you're feeling now. You were so upset the last time we talked...

[weirdnecro]

[She snorted in laughter. That was cute.]

Ah, well...that's...kind of mixed? Like, I'm not spiraling anymore, so that's great. I feel...stable.

Just that under level of feeling sorry for myself, which isn't...great.

[heyboss]

[He flashes her a small smile.]

The feeling sorry for yourself isn't fun, but that emotion won't kill you. It won't hurt you.

I'm relieved you're feeling stable, though. Really. It must have been exhausting to carry all of that all at once.

[weirdnecro]

I don't like it. It feels...gross.

But admittedly, the day I came back home, I slept the best I had in days.

I tend not to sleep when I'm stressed, so. That might have been part of it.

[heyboss]

John is very good for sleep.

[He is quite pleased to hear that, though.]

And I'm so relieved that you moved back in where you feel safe.

[weirdnecro]

He's been making sure that I have a tentacle on me whenever I'm in the cabin.

[Her voice was very fond. He missed her, and she missed him just as much.]

We agreed that we'll live together from now on. My cabin will mostly be for storage.

We're hoping the Admiral will approve of an art studio slash workshop in our living space.